Most of us are aware of The Five Love Languages by Dr. Gary Chapman. He categorizes how love is expressed and experienced through quality time, acts of service, physical touch, words of affirmation, and gifts. If you don’t know your husband’s primary love language, observe how he expresses himself, listen to his complaints about your relationship, and record what he requests of you most often. Then, the fun part! Once you identify his love language, you’ve got to figure out how to speak it.
Knowing how to speak your partner’s love language will help you communicate love to him in a deep way. But coming up with creative ideas to express them can be tough. Like any expression of love, sometimes repeated acts get overlooked. Here are 30 fresh ideas to get your creativity sparked. You’ll be speaking his language in no time.
Quality Time
Quality time is intentionally spending time with and being fully present to your husband.
- Set up a whole day together that’s distraction-free. Arrange to have the kids be with their grandparents before he wakes up. Make sure to leave the phones at home.
- Participate with him in an activity he enjoys that you don’t usually do.
- Pick him up after work with his favorite takeout. Drive to a meaningful spot to share it while you talk.
- Set up a treasure hunt together. Create a list of 10 things you have to find together. Make sure you will have to go to several different locations to get them. Finish with a celebratory dessert.
- Take a class together.
- Ask him about his bucket list and why each item on it is important.
Acts of Service
People who have acts of service as their love language most feel loved when you complete tasks for them.
- Have his car detailed for him.
- Surprise him by doing a chore for him that he doesn’t like to do.
- Give him a full day off from family commitments to do whatever he likes.
- Put his towel in the dryer while he’s in the shower and bring it to him when he’s finished. It will be nice and warm.
- Ask him if there’s anything on his to-do list you could do for him.
- Cook or buy him his favorite meal.
Touch
Men with touch as a love language need a physical connection.
- Lightly touch him on the arm as you walk past him.
- Sit close enough in public that your legs are touching.
- While watching TV, play with his hair.
- Rest your head on his chest in bed, even if it’s just for a couple of minutes before you go to sleep.
- Give him a hand massage.
- Instead of just saying bye, give him a hug in the morning before you head to work.
Words of Affirmation
Words of affirmation are thoughtful statements of appreciation.
- Hide sticky notes with words of appreciation in his car and around the house where he will find them.
- Write him an old fashioned letter and mail it to the house.
- Text him an acrostic with one descriptive word for each letter of his name.
- Hold eye contact with him while you tell him why he’s a good husband, dad, friend, employee, or son. This communicates that he is valuable in every role he has.
- Text him a video of you saying what you appreciate about him.
- Use a dry-erase marker on the bathroom mirror to write words that describe him.
Gifts
He’ll especially feel loved when he receives a gift from you that shows you really know him.
- Have his favorite food delivered to him at work.
- Leave tickets to a sporting or musical event on the dash of his car.
- Create a playlist for him of all his favorite songs. Have it playing when he starts getting ready for his day.
- Order something he’s been wanting online and have it shipped to him when he least expects it.
- Place his favorite treat on the passenger seat of his car so he’ll find it when he leaves for work.
- Send him on a scavenger hunt and let the last clue lead him to a gift he’s talked about.
What are some creative ways you have expressed your husband’s love language?
