Mom Inspiration, Motherhood

Stressed Out Mom Scale

Do you ever feel like all of the needs of your children are wearing you out? Do you feel like “me time” is a concept you just can’t fathom?

See where you fall on the “Mommed Out” scale. Count how many of these apply to you, and see your score below:

You look at your precious angels and think to yourself, “The only way I could love you more is if you were asleep.”
You daydream about a walk on the beach only to wake up and realize you’re standing in a pile of crushed cereal.
You wish your forehead was equipped with an open and closed sign made of flashing neon.
Scavenger hunts for lost homework, clothes, shoes, or sports equipment rival the adventures of Dora the Explorer.
The books on your “must read” list all have cartoon animal characters or have something to do with a man named Seuss.
Your husband comes home and says, “What is that awful smell?” and you think, “What smell?”
The thought of taking a goat to the grocery store is more appealing than taking your own children.
Feeling like the moon and the stars need to be in perfect alignment before you can even think about going out with friends.
While at your child’s practice, your thoughts wander to visions of a movie at the theater, dining out alone or—better yet, getting a solid night’s sleep.
You dream of cooking your family a dinner that consists of more than chicken fingers, bread without crust and plain noodles with butter.
You consider sewing yourself an outfit made of paper towels.
You’ve considered putting a taxi fare meter in your family vehicle to make extra money.
You can’t remember the last time you went to the bathroom alone.
Your holy grail is first place in the afterschool pick-up line.
You wish you had arms like an octopus making you the better octo-mom.
Your catchphrases are:

Don’t make me.
Who has lost their mind?
Maybe next time.
They just ran out.
This store doesn’t have a toy department.

You’ve baked enough cupcakes and cookies that when placed side by side, could circle the globe twice.
You can count on one hand how many hours you’ve slept this week.
You remember when laundry day was just one day.
You forgo your dream kitchen to pay for school tuition, music lessons or sports clubs.
The most strategic thing you do all day is avoid candy in the check-out lane and fast food drive-through.
You’re proud of your ninja-like prowess as the Tooth Fairy, Easter Bunny and Santa Claus.
Just once, you wish your child’s whine came with some cheese.
Your time-out chair sees more action than your dining room chair.
You’re hoping that stains will become the new black.
You wish you really did have eyes in the back of your head.