The 3 basics of being a good mom start with being attentive to your kids when you’re with them. In most moms’ lives, one of the biggest things that keeps us from being attentive to our children is our phone. Researchers at the University of Southern Maine found that people who could not see their cell phone had a better focus on a task than those who could see their cell phone. So it makes sense that the “task” of focusing on our children is better performed when our cell phone is put away.
Following that advice would look like this in real life: When your children get up in the morning, have your cell phone tucked away in a kitchen drawer and leave it there. When your children are coming home or you’re walking in the door from work, keep your cell phone in your bag. When you’re in the car, keep your cell phone put away.
But what about taking pictures? I mainly use my phone to take photos of my kids. Try to at least keep your phone out of sight for an hour at a time – with a 10-minute window after that for photos. Because even if those spontaneous photos are darling and cute and great to share, your children will benefit more from your attention than from having more photos of themselves on social media.
Better yet, go a whole day without taking photos of your children. Instead, relish the moment without the barrier of a phone between you and your child. Here are the 3 basics of being a good mom.
I recently wrote about celebrating the mom you are. I wanted moms to see that there different kinds of moms – and that they are the perfect kind of mom for their children. So no matter your mom personality, you can be a good mom (and you probably already are)!
1. Being a good mom means you’re attentive to your children.
This is what we addressed above. Being an attentive mom doesn’t mean that you are engaging your children every moment. It does mean that when your children need your full attention, you give it to them. That’s the point of putting our phone away. If your child is talking to you and you glance at your phone to see if you got a text or an email, the bond is broken.
2. Being a good mom means you do all things with love.
Love should encapsulate all we do with our children – from having fun with them to disciplining them. That means that we are firm with our children, but not harsh. It means that we live out the love passage.
Love should encapsulate all we do with our children – from having fun with them to disciplining them.
3. Being a good mom means you show that you’re human.
One of the greatest gifts we can give our children is being a good example of how to handle life. So let them see you cry when you’re sad. Let them hear you give yourself a pep talk or say a prayer to get out of a funk. Show them that it’s okay to make mistakes as long as we learn from them and apologize when needed.
Let’s Talk: Can you go a whole day without taking a photo of your children?