Uncommon Marriage: Welcome to the Neighborhood


In this abridged passage, Lauren shares what it was like when the Dungys moved to a new city for Tony’s job with the NFL.

Though I knew moving into a new home and building friendships would take some time, I was in for another shock when we arrived in Kansas City. I could not believe the hours Tony and the rest of the coaches were required to work during the season. In Pittsburgh, Chuck Noll had kept his staff at the office as late as 9 p.m. only on an occasional Tuesday night. In Kansas City, Marty kept his coaches working past 1 a.m. Tuesday through Thursday all season long. In fact, sometimes he kept them way past 1.

That was one of the toughest adjustments for me. I can remember many nights that first fall when Tony came home at 2 a.m. He would wake me up from a sound sleep, we’d have a short conversation, and then he would want to try to get some rest. I barely saw him, but the kids never saw him during the week. They were asleep when he got home and were usually still sleeping when he left for work the next day. So our evenings were a lot different. That’s probably why I especially missed the support we’d had at Bethany, our church in Pittsburgh.

One of the reasons, in fact, that Tony had gone to Kansas City early was to get a jump on finding a church. But it didn’t turn out that way. We’d been spoiled by seven years at Bethany Baptist with Richard Farmer. He’d been one of the people we’d gone to for help in sorting through our decision, but when we asked him to recommended a church like Bethany in Kansas City, he said he couldn’t help because nothing came to his mind.

Finding a church we loved as much as Bethany would be a tough task anyway. We had been at Bethany for our entire marriage. We loved the worship style and the church’s small size. The teaching was awesome and we had grown so much as a couple and as a family.

I wasn’t just missing Bethany though. My entire support system—my parents, sister, brothers, and close friends—were no longer nearby.

You can read more from Uncommon Marriage: Learning about Lasting Love and Overcoming Life’s Obstacles Together by Tony and Lauren Dungy by ordering a copy of the book here.

Listen to an exclusive interview with Tony Dungy and Mark Merrill, President of Family First and iMOM.  

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