ASK YOUR KIDS
Fall Riddles and Jokes
Q: WHAT DO YOU USE TO MEND A JACK-O-LANTERN?
A: A PUMPKIN PATCH.
THE NURSE WALKED INTO THE BUSY DOCTOR’S OFFICE AND SAID, “DOCTOR,
THE INVISIBLE MAN IS HERE.” THE DOCTOR REPLIED, “SORRY, I CAN’T SEE HIM.”
Q: WHO WON THE SKELETON BEAUTY CONTEST?
A: NO BODY.
WHO HELPS THE LITTLE PUMPKINS CROSS THE ROAD TO SCHOOL?
A: THE CROSSING GOURD.
WHAT DO YOU GET WHEN YOU DIVIDE THE CIRCUMFERENCE OF YOUR
JACK-O-LANTERN BY ITS DIAMETER?
A: PUMPKIN PI.
THE NURSE WALKED INTO THE BUSY DOCTOR’S OFFICE AND SAID, “DOCTOR,
THE INVISIBLE MAN IS HERE.” THE DOCTOR REPLIED, “SORRY, I CAN’T SEE HIM.”
I’M TALL WHEN I’M YOUNG, I’M SHORT WHEN I’M OLD, AND EVERY
HALLOWEEN I STAND UP INSIDE JACK-O-LANTERNS. WHAT AM I?
A: A CANDLE.
WHAT DO YOU GET WHEN YOU DROP A PUMPKIN?
A: SQUASH.
A FAMILY OF FALL LEAVES WERE TRYING TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB.
A SQUIRREL WALKED BY AND ASKED WHY THE BULB WASN’T CHANGED YET.
THE RED LEAF SAID, “BECAUSE WE KEEP FALLING.”
WHAT HAPPENED WHEN THE TURKEY GOT IN A FIGHT?
A: HE GOT THE STUFFING KNOCKED OUT OF HIM.
WHAT DID ONE LEAF SAY TO ANOTHER?
A: I’M FALLING FOR YOU.
WHY ARE ALL SUPERMAN COSTUMES TIGHT?
A: THEY’RE ALL SIZE S
WHY DO BIRDS FLY SOUTH IN THE FALL?
A: BECAUSE IT’S TOO FAR TO WALK.
WHY IS DRACULA SO EASY TO FOOL?
A: BECAUSE HE’S A SUCKER.
WHO LIVES IN THE SCARY HUNDRED ACRE WOOD?
A: WINNIE THE BOO.
