Even if you’ve never heard of TMS, you’ve probably had it—Tired Mom Syndrome. I coined the phrase after noticing a daily cycle. I wake up feeling hopeful for the day, ready to tackle my to-do list and be a great mom. But then, around early evening, fatigue sets in, and I become a different person. The symptoms? There are no cramps or bloating, but there’s for sure a higher level of irritability. If you have TMS you also might have a desire to sequester yourself from all the noise. Oh, and my favorite symptom? Simple tasks, like packing lunches or folding a pair of socks, take twice as long as they should because my mind just isn’t running on all cylinders.
I started joking about TMS because I wanted to help my children understand that moms have limits. They laughed. Then I said, “But seriously, things have to change.” If you’re frustrated by how little you have to give at the end of the day and how much your kids don’t seem to notice that you’re a human, you need to implement some changes, too. Here’s how to handle tired mom syndrome.
1. Pause before you lose it.
My children were in rare form on the way home from school one day. They were loud and antsy but, in fairness, they were just letting off steam after a long day in the classroom. We were about a block from home when I felt myself near the point of losing it. I did not want to say something I would regret later. So I asked them to get out of the car and walk home. Well actually, I firmly told them to please get out of the car—now.
That little bit of alone time helped me pull it back together, and we laughed about the situation later. It was a better outcome than if I had lost it in the car. And don’t worry, they were on the sidewalk and I was keeping an eye on them in the rearview mirror.
2. Act like a baby.
While I was on a walk with a good friend the other morning, we started talking about naps. We both observed that Tired Mom Syndrome is much more likely to strike when we’re tired. I mean, it’s kind of obvious. “Tired” is in the name! Still, we tend to think we can forgo sleep to fit in one more thing and not suffer the consequences.
Enter the nap. It can be as short as 10 minutes, but if you can get in a good half hour every now and then, do it. You’ll think better. You’ll have more patience. You’ll be nicer to your children. My friend told me that she’s stolen a quick nap in the school pickup line! If you can’t slip a nap into your day, try to get more sleep at night. I know it’s tough. There is always one more thing to do at night or we just need that alone time after the kids are in bed, but try not to go too many nights without getting good rest.
3. Cut back.
I woke up this morning at 3:30 and could not go back to sleep. My mind was spinning with the appointments I needed to schedule, the bills I needed to pay, and the clothes—lots of clothes—I needed to fold. There will always be laundry, but it might be time to start delegating this chore to the kids. Then look at your calendar. Is there white space? If every day has an obligation, it’s probably time to cut back. All your commitments seem important, but are they more important than your health and your relationships with your husband and kids?
To really beat TMS, you also have to cut back on worry. Worry compounds TMS. But cutting back on worrying is easier said than done. Still, what helps me is praying. I ask God to help me realize that there is only so much a mom can do. A lot of things are out of my control. Those are the things that worry is wasted on.
Pray. Ask God to help you realize that there is only so much a mom can do. Click To TweetHow do you handle being a tired mom? What helps you stay energized?
