We got in a pretty heated discussion during a meeting the other day. The topic: parents spying on kids. One of our iMOM writers had written about three ways she spied on her children. We debated whether it was parental monitoring or an
A single mom raising a son can feel like a chef working in someone else’s kitchen. You know what you’re doing, but everything feels a little foreign and out of place. A single mom with a daughter can find some comfort and confidence
My parents told me I needed to lose weight when I was 11 or so. The words were said with love, but they still hit hard. Young girls hold onto single comments like that longer than we should. I can’t help but wonder
When I was in college, the dining hall was the place to hang out. On one particular morning, I was heading in for a quick bite to eat before class when I was stopped by an argument taking place in the doorway. A
As soon as you become pregnant with a baby boy, you start hearing the myths about raising boys. The ones I heard most are that boys are rambunctious, they love dirt and jumping off things, and they always smell like the outdoors. I have
My friend Annie has the neatest relationship with her 12-year-old son, Asher. When Annie showed up for our girls’ night out, looking stylish as ever, she gave her son credit. “Ash picked out my earrings!” I love that she pulls him into her
“Why do I have to learn ______?” Whatever the lesson of the day is—algebra, the periodic table, state capitals—if you have a kid who isn’t motivated to do school work, he will fight you tooth and nail. And I say “he” because motivating
Society needs to stop telling us to change our boys. Our boys are being taught that they need to be like girls in order to succeed. Boys are being handed a disadvantage when they’re told they need to change who they are. When we feminize boys so much that it goes against God’s design, we hinder our sons.
My boys stump me daily. I think like a woman, reason like a woman, and react like a woman. And I’m regularly reminded that my boys don’t think, process, or react like me. As a single mom raising five boys, I’ve felt the disadvantage of not having their dad in the home. Especially because character building for kids often feels more natural coming from the parent of the same gender. And while they have male influences through family, coaches, and mentors at church, I still worry about how being raised by a single mom will affect them. How can I help them become strong men, husbands, and leaders? Today, we’re looking at 5 ways single moms can instill character in their sons.
Do you compare your kids to each other or to their friends? It’s kind of impossible not to. I have two sons. One is way more stereotypically “boyish” than the other. Until the little one was old enough to ask for specific toys, we didn’t own a sword or lightsaber. My older son was happy with blocks and farm animals. All of the stereotypical hobbies for boys were not his style. So here are these two kids, 20 months apart. They have the same parents and the same exposure to television. Yet my little one is just so much more naturally rough and tumble. My older son never wrestled with his grandfather until his brother started doing it. He never jumped off a bench at the park. At a souvenir shop, the little one grabs a sword and the big one, a puppet. How do you make sense of it when you have one boy who isn’t as “boyish?”
When my son was small, he would make the same bedtime request every night. “Mom,” he’d say. “Will you sit by me, lay with me, and hold me?” Then one night, he didn’t ask. “Do you want me to sit by you, lay with you, and hold you before I go?” I asked. “That’s okay, mom. Night.” And just like that, my little boy was on his way to becoming a young man. I never thought I could be an ideal “boy mom.” I just didn’t see myself as the rough and tumble, mom of boys type. It turns out, I love having a son. It’s been so intriguing to watch him grow, develop, and mature. Here’s what I’ve learned along the way.
It was a rainy August afternoon. It had been in the 90s that week, so the surprise down pour was a welcome relief. My kids were outside playing when the heavens opened up and the rain drops came down. And they just kept playing. Everything inside of me wanted them to come in. But as I watched my sons’ faces as they rode around the yard on their bikes in the pouring rain, I knew they needed to stay outside and enjoy this moment. After awhile, the rain stopped. They grew hungry and eventually made their way inside, drenched but happy. Being a mom of two boys (and one girl) has been a whirlwind experience. And I’ve had to learn a lot on the fly to continually work on our mother-son relationship. Here are a few things I’ve learned that my boys need from me.
