“I just wanna play some video games,” my son said after school. He dropped his heavy bag on the kitchen floor and brushed past me. “I need to chill.” Something had happened. Maybe that chem test didn’t go well. Or someone said something at lunch. Sure, I could give him some time to mellow out by gaming, but I knew from experience that the sour mood would return as soon as the gaming ended. Screen time just put his emotions on hold.
Because screens are so much a part of our lives, it’s not realistic to avoid them completely. But too much time online isn’t healthy, especially for teens who are growing and developing so much each day. So how does screen time affect your mental and emotional health? Here are 5 effects of excessive screen use on teens and what we can do about it.
1. Depression goes up.
“I feel naked without my phone,” admitted one of my teens. It’s become so entrenched in teens’ behavior that putting a phone in their pocket is as habitual as putting on shoes. But too much screen time may be linked to an increase in depressive symptoms according to research. When they’re looking at screens, they’re not making effort to interact with others and develop relationships. This can lead to loneliness and, consequently, to depression.
What you can do: Designate certain hours for screen-free time each day (for example 5 to 7 p.m.). Have your teens place their devices in a central location where you can keep track of them.
2. Anxiety goes up.
In addition to depression, research in ScienceDirect says kids who spend seven or more hours per day on screens are also twice as likely to be diagnosed with anxiety. When kids carry phones to school, the temptation to be on them goes up. Whether it’s in the halls during passing time, at lunch, or even at the end of class checking snaps and texts, many kids use phones throughout the day. But screen time also includes video games, YouTube, and social media in the evenings and on weekends. The hours quickly add up.
What you can do: Set limits on screen time. It’s essential for kids’ mental health to also engage in activities that don’t involve screens. If your kids are used to unlimited screen use, you’ll probably have pushback. But stay firm. You can do this.
Tweens and teens are not too old for a Screen Time Contract. When you know it’ll benefit their mental and emotional health, it’s worth a try. Download ours for free today, and help your teen structure his time better around screens.
3. Loneliness goes up.
Even though kids are sending dozens of texts and snaps, playing interactive video games, and posting on social media, they’re connecting less in person. And this has negative consequences. “Kids are more ‘connected’ than ever, yet they feel lonelier,” said Sophia Choukas-Bradley, PhD, in an article by the American Psychological Association. The lack of IRL connections leaves kids without the emotional support of close friendships that they need to get through the bumps of adolescence.
What you can do: Encourage your teen to get a part-time job or volunteer. Both positions expose teens to a variety of individuals, and even casual interactions can combat loneliness. Also, they can add a sense of purpose to your teen’s life, something many people struggle with when they’re feeling lonely, according to Mental Health America.
4. Empathy goes down.
We want our teens to respond to others with empathy, but without real-life practice, skills like really listening, seeing another viewpoint, and showing compassion aren’t developed. Like many of us, teens often use downtime to scroll instead of making small talk at their lockers or even in the lunchroom. Tracy S. Bennett, Ph.D. says, “Some experts believe that the rate at which young people and children express empathy has declined by as much as 25% in the past 10 years.”
What you can do: Your teen still looks to you as an example (even if she won’t admit it). At home, keep your phone in a drawer when your teen’s around and when you’re out together, try to engage with the grocery worker or sales rep instead of using your phone to look up answers.
5. Emotional regulation skills don’t improve.
When teens are glued to devices, they don’t get practice handling real-life problems and the emotions that come with them. “High users of screens were significantly more likely to display poor emotion regulation (not staying calm, arguing too much, being difficult to get along with), an inability to finish tasks, lower curiosity, and more difficulty making friends,” says the research from ScienceDirect. This really isn’t good news for teens, getting ready to launch into the next phase of life.
What you can do: Help your teen name his emotion (like frustration), and stay calm as you listen to him. Ask open-ended questions to build self-awareness, like “Why do you think they reacted like that?” or “What else could have been done?” And make sure he’s getting enough sleep. All of us handle strong emotions better after a good night’s rest.
As a parent, how does screen time affect your mental and emotional health?
