You probably already know how to make your children feel loved, but do you know how to make them feel liked? You might think they only care about the approval of their friends and how well they fit in, but kids actually care a lot about what their parents think of them. Showing our kids we like them is truly one of the greatest gifts we can give.
Showing our kids we like them is truly one of the greatest gifts we can give. Click To TweetOne year over Christmas break, I decided to get intentional with the whole “like” thing. The entire prep for my little idea took about five minutes. I was blown away by how much my children enjoyed this like-fest. Their faces lit up. And I saw one of them put her papers from our activity into an envelope and tuck them away in a special place. After that success, I came up with these five ways to show like. Each one takes five minutes or less.
1. Sealed Envelope
Get the smallest envelope you can find or make your own. Write a “like note” to your child and fold it until it fits in the envelope. The point of keeping the note small in size is to write something short and sweet. When I did this for my kids, I theatrically sealed the envelope in front of them. “Open this when you need a little boost,” I told them with a smile.
2. A Likable Grab Bag
Gather five to 10 items that represent what you like about your child—a piece of candy for how sweet she is, a leaf to signify how you admire her love of nature, a tiny toy that makes you think about how fun she is—you get the idea. Have her reach into the bag and pull the items out one by one, and then share why you chose it.
3. The Name Game
Getting the whole family involved is a great idea for how to make your children feel loved and liked. We did this when my mother-in-law was over for dinner to celebrate my daughter’s birthday. I handed out pens and pieces of paper and directed each person to write my daughter’s name vertically, letter stacked upon letter, like an acrostic. “OK,” I said. “Now write one thing you like about Clara that starts with each letter.” Most of us focused on adjectives, but my teenage son, Andrew, with a twinkle in his eye, wrote, “Clara Loves Andrew Really Always.”
4. Color Compliments
Take a brown paper bag and put five items, each of a different color, in it. An easy item would be markers. As your child pulls out each marker, use this color key: Blue = say something you like about the way he or she thinks; Brown = say something about looks (Keep this one very broad, like his or her freckles, the way her hair flips at the ends, or the expression he makes when he’s excited.); Yellow = Say a character trait he or she possesses; Green = say something you like about the growing and maturing you see; and, red = say, “And, finally, red. I like you so much because you are my daughter/son, and I think you’re the best kid in the world.” If you pull out the red marker first, have your child put it back in and save it until the end.
5. The L.I.K.E. game.
Look. Intensely. Keep. Eyes locked! Put your phone in a closed drawer. Put your child’s device away too. Sit very close to each other and do not break eye contact for five minutes. While you look at each other, take turns saying something you like about each other. You might start laughing before time is up, but that’s OK because laughing with your child says “I like you” loud and clear.
What do you like about your children? Tell us (and then tell them)!
