Happy Marriage Tips

How to be Your Husband’s Girlfriend

A friend of mine heard some harsh words from her husband last week.  Harsh, but true.  He told her, during a heated discussion, that she was a great mom, but a bad wife.  Now, he and she both know that she does a lot of things right as a wife, but the overall point was that he felt that 99 percent of her focus was on their kids.  After she thought about it, she had to agree.  The ironic part is that she actually does love her husband very much, she had just fallen into the habit of putting his needs, and the needs of their marriage on the back burner.

1.    Go Old School

Come on, girls.  Think back to when you first dated your husband.  What did he fall for?  Your sense of humor or fun?  The way you laughed at all of his jokes?  Your killer brownies?  Go back to those things that first attracted him to you.

2.    Be Excited About Him

Girlfriends are thrilled to see their man, and they show it.  Wives pull themselves away from what they’re doing and give a so-so hello.  Of course, that’s a generalization, but play the girlfriend card the next time your see your husband at the end of the day.  Help him to want to see you at the end of the day.

3.    Use the Element of Surprise

Text him something cute or sexy.  Facebook him with love notes.  Plan a date night he’ll love.    Keep him guessing, but in a good way.  You know, like you did when you were dating.  Put time into thinking about fun ways to engage him and make him smile.

4.    Let Him be the Man

In my dating days my husband loved wooing me—and I let him.  But, when I became a wife and mother I became more efficient and take charge.  Doing it myself is often easier, faster and prevents me from having to wait on my husband.  But guys love to be the hero, the Mr. Fix-it, the Go-to Guy.  Let him.

5.    Play the Praise Game

Remember when you were so excited about dating your husband that you would talk about him constantly to your friends?  You could rattle off 100 things in 30 seconds that you loved about him.  Well, let him in on the good things you think about him.  Praise him in front of the kids.  Praise him in front of your friends when you and he are out together.  Let him know you still think he’s amazing.


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