Family Fun
8 Great Dates for Moms and Daughters

Moms spend a lot of time with their children; it’s the nature of the job.  But well thought out, one-on-one time with our kids is harder to come by. So get out your calendar and make it a priority.  Before you go, plan on using your time together to really get to know what your child is feeling and thinking with our Conversation Goal suggestions.

To help you get started, author Dannah Gresh has written a book called 8 Great Dates for Moms and Daughters.  Here’s an abridged version of some of those dates, along with some ideas from iMOM.  And if you have boys, check out iMOM’s 8 Great Dates for Moms and Sons.

1. She’s a Masterpiece:  Dannah Gresh encourages you to thoroughly pamper your daughter during this date.  Find a teahouse or swank hotel and make reservations.  Enjoy lavishing her with your attention and all the niceties of a girls’ lunch.
Conversation Goal:   Try to get a sense of how your daughter feels about herself overall.  Talk about how you felt at your age and share what insecurities you might have had about yourself at her age.  Respond to her with encouragement, affirmation and love.

2. She’s a Unique Beauty:  Dannah’s suggestion? Visit a spa or beauty salon for some girl pampering.  After your spa visit, head to a quiet place for lunch where you can further your relaxation with a slow-paced meal.
Conversation Goal:  Call her attention to her specific and unique beauty strengths. Yes, compliment her pretty eyes, but also talk about her strong legs and her overall strength and good health.  Try to bring up the topic of how images your daughter sees in magazines or online, are usually re-touched photos.

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3. The Real Source of Beauty:  Now take the focus off the external to the beauty inside your daughter and the world around her.  Dannah suggests infusing this date with nature—go horseback riding, have a picnic, get up early and watch the sunrise, or go on a hike.
Conversation Goal:  In her book, Dannah Gresh says, “Where does beauty really come from? As girls we sometimes get stuck on thinking it comes from a great haircut or new fingernail polish.  Sometimes we think it comes from being surrounded by friends or being noticed by cute guys.  But…you won’t find beauty there.”  Talk about how beauty shines forth from a strong spiritual life, from a relationship with God. 

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4. The Fish in the Sea:  This date is about looking at what role boys, and eventually a husband, will play in your daughter’s life.  So take her to an aquarium, a zoo, or somewhere else where you can have fun with the idea that there are lots of fish in the sea!
Conversation Goal:  Find out what your daughter thinks about boys.  Ask her who the nicest boy is in her class.  Find out who her friends like and ask her what she thinks they see in them.  Help her to realize that while she will marry one day, along the way she might face romantic disappointments.  Share some of your own heartaches.  Help her to focus on the qualities that make a man a good man.

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5. Educational Excursion:  Even if your daughter is still in grade school, hit the road and visit a college campus, or a community college in your town.  Let her see what lies beyond.
Conversation Goal:  Ask your daughter where she sees herself going to college, or what kind of education she wants after high school.  Talk about the freedom and responsibility college brings.

6. Chow Down:  What’s your daughter’s favorite food or meal?  Surprise her with a trip to her favorite place, even if it’s not the healthiest grub in town.   After lunch, drive around a pretty neighborhood and let your daughter point out the houses she likes.
Conversation Goal:  Ask your daughter what she thinks makes a house a loving home.  Ask her how she feels about her home life.  Does she like being home?  Does she feel cared for and loved?  You can even ask her about meals she’d like to have more often!

7. Faith Excursion: Experience a different worship setting together.  Attend a church as a visitor.  Present your daughter with a book or CD about faith.  Suggest going through it together.
Conversation Goal:  Use this time to assess where your child is spiritually.  Steer the conversation toward what’s really important in life.

8. Retail Therapy:  Yes, we can put too much emphasis on shopping if we’re not careful, but if your daughter likes to shop, teach her how to do it with fun and restraint.  Visit some stores that have great buys, but also visit some stores that are great just for window shopping.
Conversation Goal:  This outing is a natural for two topics: how to dress and managing money.  Use this time together to talk to your daughter about dressing cute, but modestly.  You can also bring up the need to budget in life. 

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