Mark Twain said, “I can live for two months on a good compliment,” and I agree. There is nothing like specific and detailed validation to make you feel good. I know my husband feels the same. When I think about things husbands want to hear and then use words intentionally, I can see his demeanor change. He grows in confidence, and he’s more encouraging right back.
When you live with someone day in and day out, it’s easy to forget that your words of encouragement are important. Think of how you speak to coworkers. Do you offer more positive feedback to them than you do to your husband? If so, it’s worth doing an experiment. Try complimenting him once per day for a full week. Not sure what will give your husband a boost? We’ve surveyed the guys around here and found the 10 things husbands want to hear most from their wives. If we missed one, let us know.
1. “I love being your wife.”
As simple as it sounds, husbands want to know that their wives are happy and enjoy being with them. When was the last time you thanked your husband for choosing you? Don’t assume he knows you’d choose him again. Tell him!
2. “You’re a great dad.”
Deep in the heart of every man is the desire to be seen as a hero—especially to his children. Specifically, tell your husband why he’s your kids’ hero, like, “They notice your integrity and look up to you.” And tonight, at dinner, tell your children why he is so special.
3. “You turn me on.”
Sure, there’s pressure on women’s appearances, but men care about theirs, too. As guys’ hairlines begin to recede and stomachs start protruding, they can become sensitive, so never make fun of how your husband looks. Tell him he’s hot and that you’re attracted to him.
4. “I respect the decision you made.”
Sometimes wives are overly critical of their husbands’ choices, even when they have no skin in the game. “Why did you decide to paint the shelf that color?” or “Was letting the kids eat cookies the best choice?” Sometimes we need to accept that men do things differently than we do. If your husband made a choice using intention and wisdom, let him know you respect it. And if you’re unsure he thought it out, give him the benefit of the doubt.
5. “I know it’s important to live within our means. I’m with you on this.”
You might be the saver and your husband might be the spender, but if he’s concerned about your family’s finances, let him know you’re on the same page. Having a wife he can rely on to spend and save wisely is a tremendous comfort to him.
6. “I’m grateful for your spiritual leadership.”
All of us are hardwired for a relationship with God, and many men want to be seen as the spiritual caretakers of their families. Encourage your husband in his faith and to take his role as a spiritual leader seriously.
7. “You’re wise.”
Many men are born problem solvers and relish the process of thinking through something and arriving at a solution. This could explain why your husband is often trying to “fix” your problems when all you want him to do is listen. Even if you don’t need your problem to be fixed, tell him you appreciate his wisdom and attempt to help.
8. “I notice how hard you work.”
There are many things in life that your husband cannot control, but what he can control is his effort. It brings him pleasure to work hard and see the results. To be the man responsible for creating something from nothing thrills him. Encourage his great work ethic.
9. “I appreciate your help.”
This is universal for men and women, but when a man serves his wife, he wants her to notice. A simple thank you is all he needs. Practicing gratitude in marriage can change the air in your home. Try saying thank you for small things like making the bed, scheduling an oil change, or running the vacuum.
Practicing gratitude in marriage can change the air in your home. Click To Tweet10. “I’m impressed with how you handled that situation.”
Sometimes a wife will point out when her husband does not handle something well. So when he handles a particularly difficult situation well, let him know.
Share this list of 20 Things Wives Love to Hear From Their Husbands with your hubby so he can work on it too!
What’s missing from this list?
