My husband and I have been married for almost eight years. Romance looks a lot different than it did in the beginning of our relationship. We’re older and more tired; we have more responsibilities and demands. But I still get that warm glow in the pit of my stomach when I glance across the room and realize he’s mine. Keeping your connection growing and your fire burning takes intention. You don’t have to be a newly married couple to still be truly in love. Here are 5 things couples in love can do every day; these actions help keep our love strong.
I can’t tell you how many times I’m busy doing something else while my husband is speaking: checking my iPhone, putting away groceries, cleaning up, etc. When we both put down what we’re doing and look into each other’s eyes, to fully pay attention especially when communicating, we remember why we fell in love. Making eye contact says that person is important to you and you value them enough to give them your undivided attention.
2. Hug & Smooch
It’s amazing how much better my day gets when I take the time to give my husband a full wraparound hug in the morning. Turns out it’s also a scientific fact. Oxytocin, also known as the “cuddle hormone,” gets released when we hug, producing feelings of bonding, trust, and devotion. While you’re at it, give your partner a smooch on the lips. Kissing reminds me we’re not roommates, we’re love mates.
3. Laugh together
It’s normal to let the practical details of life crowd out your humor, but happy couples have inside jokes that keep the relationship strong. Laughter triggers the release of endorphins and is a stress reliever. It also increases attraction to your partner. So laugh at that joke, or make one of your own. You never know what it might lead to.
4. Compliment each other
Successful couples take the time to say encouraging things to one another; they build connection through not taking one another for granted. I noticed when I say thank you to my husband, or compliment his strengths, he responds with giving me more affection. So don’t focus on the negative, look for the positive, and you might be surprised what you receive in return.
Successful couples take the time to say encouraging things to one another; they build connection through not taking one another for granted.
5. Forgive each other
Even couples who are in love hurt each other. Rather than letting offenses pile up and make you bitter, practice telling your truth daily to your partner and forgiving them when they mess up. Most likely, they were not trying to hurt you intentionally. Keeping a short list of offenses ensures disconnection and discord do not build up in your relationship and choke it. Don’t hold a grudge or hold the offense over their head. When you forgive do your best to forget. This is the number one thing my partner and I practice that keeps us feeling in love with one another. Try it. Pretty soon, you’ll feel those “in love” butterflies in your stomach once again.
Readers, what else do you think should be added to the list?
Sarita Hartz is a life coach, writer, and recovering perfectionist who speaks about wholehearted living and self-care in her blog Whole.