At 6:30 a.m. MT on September 11, 2001, I was a junior in high school watching our nation’s most horrific tragedy from the comfort of my bedroom in Tucson, Arizona. I sat on the edge of my floral bed staring at my stickered white television, stunned, sickened, and unsure. As I watched the smoke spill, the second plane collide, and the towers crumble, I had no idea that my life would eventually become deeply intertwined with the effects of that day.
Eight years later, I married an Army pilot who deployed to Afghanistan twice in the first four years of our marriage. My husband survived being shot down during his first tour. On his next deployment, he was stationed at the most rocketed base in Afghanistan. I quickly learned the importance of lavishly loving my husband like today could be his last. Trust me—if you’re unsure how to show love to your husband, this is a great practice. Although he may not be a soldier, you never know the day he’ll take his final breath. So don’t wait to try these 4 ways to show love to your husband like today is his last day.
1. Make his bucket list happen.
Before a soldier deploys to war, there’s an ominous sense of the unknown and a desire to embrace life’s adventures. I truly did not know if my husband would return home months later, so there was an urgency to do important things together. Think about an activity that’s high on your husband’s bucket list and make it happen! I decided to surprise my husband with a trip to the NCAA basketball championships. It was one of the best experiences of his life because he has a passion for college sports. Watching him beaming with uncontainable joy made me happy too. Helping him make the most of his life is a great idea for how to show love to your husband.
2. Initiate passionate intimacy like it’s your last time together.
On the eve of deployment, I know there’s a possibility my husband and I may never be together again. I want him to leave feeling completely adored and fulfilled. Put all your differences aside for one evening and focus wholly on the man you married. Make it your goal that he feels more special than ever. Consider imagining that this is the last time you will get to be together so that you love him like never before.
3. Tell him all the reasons you cherish him.
A phone call from Afghanistan telling me that my husband survived machine-gun fire and a rocket-propelled grenade to his aircraft generated overwhelming gratitude in me. Spend today writing a list of all the reasons you love your husband. Even if you feel a little silly, give him your list and talk about each quality. Make sure he leaves the conversation knowing how much you cherish him.
4. Recreate your favorite memory as a couple.
Last summer, my husband and I rewrote our wedding vows and read them to each other on a balcony overlooking the beach. Recreating the moment we pledged our commitment to one another was deeply moving and extra special because our children were there this time. Reflect on your most magical or exciting memories as a couple and pick one to recreate to show love to your husband.
What would you do for your husband if today were his last day?
