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4 Ways Being Married to Your Opposite Will Stretch You

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A few years ago, my husband, our three kids, and I were celebrating a quiet, peaceful Christmas Day in our home. We had no plans except to enjoy our day together. It was perfect—or so I thought.

At 11 a.m., my husband asked if we could invite friends over. He was bored with the plans of nothingness. He wanted noise, people, and activity. I was crushed. I thought it was the best way to spend the day with our little family, but my husband wasn’t into it. I had to remind myself (again) that my husband is opposite from me, and that a marriage between opposites is OK as long as we’re both willing to compromise. Knowing that doesn’t make it easy, though, and we’ve definitely experienced our share of growing pains. If you and your husband are opposites in some vital areas, here are 4 ways being married to your opposite will stretch you.

1. It will balance you out.

Say your husband is spontaneous and messy, but you are calculated and tidy. Over time, you’ll learn to loosen up and realize that sometimes, going with the flow is not as scary as you thought. A healthy marriage between opposites will give you both plenty of practice in compromising and you might come to realize that the way you do things might actually be extreme instead of the “right” or “only” way.

2. You’ll become a better communicator.

Being married to your opposite will force you to become a better listener, which will lead to becoming a better communicator. Being with someone who thinks differently from you will teach you to see another side of a point or approach to a problem. You’ll get good at tailoring how you communicate by being considerate of how each other thinks and what your preferences are.

Being married to your opposite will force you to become a better listener, which will lead to becoming a better communicator. Click To Tweet

3. You’ll be more empathetic toward different personalities and love needs.

Being married to my extroverted, high-energy husband has made me a better mom and friend. I understand one of my children’s personalities a lot better since he’s so similar to my husband. And I have more empathy for all the love languages of the vast personalities of people in my life. When you are married to someone completely opposite of you, it teaches you how to love people who are different from you.

4. You’ll learn more about yourself.

A marriage between opposites can teach you quite a bit about yourself. You have certain expectations and characteristics and maybe you didn’t realize it until you were married. Perhaps you grew up in a home that ran on a tight schedule. The days, chores, and activities all fit into a neat and orderly routine, and you thought this was normal because you grew up this way. Then you married your husband, who doesn’t work well with a strict schedule. You’ll learn that you can be happily married and help raise a family without operating on so strictly. When you learn something about yourself, you can act on it in a healthy way for growth and change.

What about you? How have your differences made you and your husband better people?

ASK YOUR CHILD...

Would you rather be best friends with someone who’s the same as you or different from you? Why?

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