“Is there a new-moms group?” my friend Victoria asked in email. “Maybe at the library?” I’d just put my baby down for a nap and had some time to myself. But Victoria’s email unsettled me. We’d moved to a new city only two weeks earlier and she knew I hadn’t had time yet to make new friends. Having a new baby kept me busy enough! “You need to meet people and get out there. Let me know what you find!” But as unsettling as it was, her email was the push I needed to get out of my comfort zone.
I hadn’t been a mom long enough to get bored staying home and I told myself I liked being on my own with my new baby. But I listened to Victoria and found a local new-moms group that was starting soon. Opportunities for my baby and me grew from there and none of them would’ve happened if I hadn’t taken that first step. So, I’m going to give you the same encouragement my friend gave me. Get out there. Be brave. You can do it! Here are 3 reasons new moms need to get out of their comfort zones.
1. To Make New Friends and Find Support
I had to force myself to be brave and join the new-moms group. Also, because we didn’t own a car at the time, I had to take the city bus to get there. I had to rely on the kindness of strangers to help me lift the stroller up and down the steps. Not easy! But I made it work and the struggle empowered me to do more with my baby on public transport. Together, my son and I ventured to the library for story time, and later, to toddler gym classes and dance classes. I met other moms in these places, and a few turned into close friends.
It helped having other moms to talk to during this time. When we step out of our comfort zones, it feels stressful at first. But when we talk to new people and try new things with our babies, we grow. And growth makes us more well-rounded women and better moms.
When we talk to new people and try new things with our babies, we grow. Click To Tweet2. To Provide Socialization for Your Baby
When my son started a part-time preschool at age 3, I made friends with another mom named Elinor. Our sons played together, but her boy, Michael, had gotten in trouble for hitting a few times. “Mrs. Breton asked me if Michael had ever been in a playgroup before starting preschool,” Elinor told me. “She said he hadn’t learned how to get along with the other kids.”
Socialization is important for little ones, and even though the question upset Elinor, I understood the teacher’s point. Kids start exploring their world as soon as they can crawl. Even if playgrounds and playgroups aren’t your idea of stress-free fun, try getting out of your comfort zone a little more. He needs to start learning social skills early on and you never know—it might save you some heartache later when he shows off his excellent sharing skills.
3. To Challenge Yourself to Be a Better Mom
When my daughter was 2, she and I spent a weekend home alone together. Excited, I got out my shoebox of nail polishes and lined up a handful of bottles on the kitchen table. “Pick a color!” I said. She turned a couple bottles in her hands, curious, but once she caught a whiff of the smell, she made a decision: none of them. Undeterred, I painted my toenails and then hers. Ten years have passed since then, and we haven’t done our nails together again. But she and I have played with trucks, dinosaurs, LEGOs, and lots of dirt. Who knew she’d want to do everything her brother did? I had to reframe my perception of what having a little girl meant to me.
A friend told me her son likes to play with Nerf guns and even uses sticks to “pew pew!” his brother. She didn’t feel totally comfortable with guns at first but said she decided not to limit his creativity as long as he was being safe. Both her son and my daughter challenged us by pushing us outside our comfort zones. But by allowing our kids to explore their interests, we’ve allowed them to be themselves.
In what ways would you benefit from getting out of your comfort zone?
