Unless your kids meet the people they’re meant to marry when they’re 15, chances are they’ll experience some heartache. Hopefully, you’ll be there with a shoulder to cry on. But what’s the right and wrong way to help your child through a breakup? In this episode, Megan shares a story of when she had her heart broken, and Susan had the right words to say.
Not all kids want to talk to their moms. Chloe says she didn’t want to share relationship drama with her parents because she didn’t want them to dislike her boyfriend. (You never know! They might get back together.) Abby said she didn’t want to talk about it because her mom was a teacher at her school. You can’t blame kids in small communities for not sharing too much with their parents. Everyone knows everyone! But there are definitely some best practices to keep in mind when you’re helping your child through a breakup, like not to use clichés and reminding them not to throw away other things they have going for them just because of this.
One thing that makes breakups especially difficult for parents to navigate is social media. When we were growing up, our relationship status was only known by word of mouth, and photos of us with exes were shoved in a shoebox, not stuck online for everyone to see. Now, kids are faced with decisions like whether to block the person, when to change your relationship status, whether to delete photos, what to do if the other person shares personal stuff or is bitter and talks bad about you, and how to handle other people being nosy and asking—or gossiping—about the breakup. Moms can feel like we’re in uncharted territory. Just remember, your presence is the most important thing. Even if you don’t have the words to say or if your child doesn’t spill all the details, sometimes a hug is the perfect remedy for a broken heart.
Articles We Mentioned
5 Dos and Don’ts of Helping Your Kid Through a Breakup
Pew Research Center: Technology and Breakups
Printables We Think You’ll Like
Tell us your breakup story—either what you went through as a teen or how you’ve handled watching your child go through one.
