When your name changed to “Mom,” did you experience an identity crisis? Even if you were overjoyed to become a mother, it’s a massive change for your body, mind, and self-image. In today’s episode, we’ll talk about adjusting to this new (and hopefully improved) version of you.
We start the episode with a story about Elon Musk’s ex, who spoke to Vogue magazine about becoming a mom. She said that “being a mother feels weird to say. For some reason, I don’t identify with that word.” She said her son calls her by her first name, Claire, and he doesn’t say “mama.” She added, “Maybe he can sense my distaste for the word ‘mother.’” No shame to Claire. We understand that words hold power and connote different emotions in people. But we wonder why she doesn’t identify with the word. What is it about going by “Mom” that makes her feel like it’s not who she is?
Most women go through a transition time when they don’t feel like the old versions of themselves, but they don’t quite feel like they’re a new person yet or fully identify as a mother. That can be confusing, and it can give us an unhealthy dose of imposter syndrome. This is especially true in relationships with our husbands and our bodies. Our bodies have grown our babies and maybe feed our babies, and we see them as very functional. Our husbands… don’t. And that’s when things get complicated!
So there are the thoughts in our own heads about becoming a mom, the way we relate to our husbands, and then of course, how we see ourselves as professionals. If you have a full-time or even part-time job, having a child can make you see your job completely differently. For some of us, our jobs become more fulfilling; for others, it becomes “just a job.”
If you’re not a new mom but wonder how you’re going to navigate the other end of the parenting journey, be sure to listen to the end of the episode. We get some wise words from Susan about how to avoid an identity crisis when your kids are grown.
Articles We Mentioned
3 Reasons Becoming “Mom” Is Awesome
Losing Yourself in Motherhood—But Maybe Not
Harvard Business Review Article About New Mothers as Professionals
