18 Things You Should Want Your Kids to Say About You

Over lunch with a friend, we chatted about the sixteenth birthday party she was planning for her daughter. I was excited to attend and catch up with her whole family. I asked, “Will your mom be there?” She groaned, “Yehhhs.” When I asked if she was happy about that, she said, “I hate saying this, but my mom doesn’t bring out the best version of me.”

That launched us into a long chat that ended with her saying, “All I know is I don’t want my daughter to ever say that about me.” Someday, our grown kids are going to talk about the kinds of moms we were, and here are 18 things we all should want them to say that are signs of a good mom.

Before you freak because this list is long…

No kid is going to say all of these things about any mom. This isn’t meant to be a checklist of things to work on. Instead, approach it in one of these ways.

Read the statements and pick some that strike a chord with you. Which ones make you tear up or think about your own mom? Ask yourself how you’re doing in those areas and then think about what you can do to grow.

Think about your purpose in parenting. This is the reason you exist as a mom. It comes from identifying your core beliefs and what your goal is for your children. Decide which of these thoughts below support that purpose, and really invest your time and energy in making sure those are true about you.

Think about your purpose in parenting. This is the reason you exist as a mom. Click To Tweet

Take the tough love approach. Ask yourself if the opposite of any of these signs of a good mom describe you. If so, don’t beat yourself up over it. Celebrate that you see an area where you can love your kids better.

Will your kids someday say these things about you?

1. She had a way of making me feel good.
2. She brought out the best in me.
3. She listened.
4. She gave me room to run but not enough to run wild.
5. I felt like she trusted me.
6. I trusted her.
7. Even when we weren’t getting along, I never questioned her love.
8. She could tell when something was wrong and let me express how I felt.
9. She was interested in my interests.
10. She knew how to have fun.
11. She validated my feelings but held me accountable for making the right decisions.
12. She was never afraid to apologize, and she always forgave me.
13. She felt like a safe place.
14. She prayed for and with me.
15. She never guilted me.
16. She was always honest, even when I needed to hear something hard.
17. She pushed me to grow up and leave the nest.
18. She believed in me.

What signs of a good mom do you want your kids to say about you someday?